Lonely Slob

Yesterday after having breakfast, I remember I wiped my mouth. When it was about lunch time, I was walking to the car with my sister and she looked at me with disgust.

Sis: My gawd! You had something for breakfast this morning that you eat with Kampong Koh Cili??

Me: How you know ah?

Sis: You have a dot of chili sauce at the corner of your lips lah! Aiyah! Why you so sia sui one? Never wash mouth after eating?

Me: Where where?? *Frantically wipe my mouth with my hands*

Sis: Eeeyehhh! It’s still there! Is your boss in today?

Me: Yes, he is… aiyoh.. sia sui betul!!!!

Sis: Now only you know ah. You freaking slob.

I think my sloppiness is getting alarming. I hardly comb my hair to office – because it’s such a huge pile of unruly hair that no amount of gel or wax could tame. The only way to tame my hair is hair wash, follow by blow dry and tease with leave-on conditioner. It’s too tedious to be doing this every morning. My round face cannot carry the out-of-bed look and it’s more like always never-out-of-bed even if I did try to tame my mane . It’s a good thing that my boss only rates me based on my performance and not my appearance.

I still remember once when I was in college, my face was infested with mother-of-all-pimples, I had to apply calamine lotion for rashes on my face. Totally forgotten about it, I went out to the shop with white patches on my face and it didn’t seem to bother me one bit. Sigh. I am a girl; I should start behaving like one.

So I guess it’s no surprise that my friends got me some grooming kit for my birthday – a comb! (hahahah!), body wash, body cream, perfume, soap, lotion, etc. This is a very obvious hint already. Okay! I get the point!

On somewhat related matter, someone got me a battery-operated device (nicknamed Franco, the device, not the person) to remind me of more lonely nights to come. He added he wanted to get me an edible underwear but who’s gonna eat it? Thanks. Tell me something I do not know, please. I guess I am destined to make chai ngor every Valentine’s Day but next time, after making chai ngor, at least I am rest assured that I will have Franco for company. I just have to make sure the battery is still working.