Sometimes it amazes me that I can stay this long in this company.
Colleague: I want to e-mail you something. Can I have your e-mail address?
Me: @#$%^&* (in my heart lah). You can use the global address. Am sure the IT has input in everybody’s PC of all our addresses in the HQ and also subsidiaries. I have your e-mail address!
C: Please gimme lah.
Me: Ok. I e-mail you now. You just reply lah. Also please cc to my boss.
C: What is your e-mail address?
Me: (Duh….I fucking give up! ) Ok…. firstname.lastname@example.org Can you also please cc to my external e-mail address? In case there’s a lag in the server.
C: External e-mail address ah? Apa itu?
Me: (OMFG)……. Please e-mail to email@example.com
C: ok…… firstname.lastname@example.org?
Me: No! G! G! G! G for Geography!(I didn’t want to say Germany because she might ended sending to email@example.com)
C: ok ok
Travel agent: Do you want to issue tickets now?
Me: Ok ok.. you gimme 5 minutes. I confirm with my boss first, then I call you back.
3 minutes later…
Me: Please issue the tickets ya. And bill it to…..
TA: Oh.. sorry. No more tickets.
TA: No more tickets now. All fully booked liao.
Me: But….. you just call me 5 minutes ago to ask me if I want to issue the tickets or not? WHAT IS THIS???
TA: Hehe.. sorry.. no more tickets going there. Hehe… But coming back still got lah. Do you want to issue, the coming back ticket?
Me: ……. YOU EXPECT MY BOSS TO SWIM THERE THEN FLY BACK HERE? IF NO MORE TICKET TO FLY OVER THERE ? WHAT IS THE FUCKING POINT OF ISSUING RETURN TICKET? ARE YOU A FUCKING MORON?
*Of course I didn’t say all the bad words and the last sentence lah but how I wish I could!
I think my boss could see me fuming and screaming over the phone and was about to drop dead from heart attack, so he forgave me. We ended booking the low cost carrier for my boss.. sigh.
Colleague: Is your boss in?
Me: No. He’s in Vietnam now.
C: Oh….. I … see… Can I know what time he will be back?
Me: (You think this is Star Trek? Beam me up Scotty?)……He will be back tomorrow at 8 pm but he will be back to office only on Monday.
C: Oh… yes… okay okay.
C: If your boss is in Vietnam, how to reach him?
Me: Call his handphone lah! Got roaming. Or can e-mail him what. He has a blackberry and ipad now!
C: Can meh ah? How to dial ah? Dial what number?
Me:…. Aiyoh…. his number lah. Normal handphone number! His number won’t change even if he’s in Vietnam… DUH!
Some moments later…
C: Eh? Why cannot call him one? Number not valid worr?
Me: Cannot be! Unless there’s no coverage there.
C: Vietnam people say cannot call him.
Me: Geeez… you mean, that the Vietnamese wanted to call him??? Aiyoh .. say earlier lah! Then you add country code in front! Malaysia is 60
C: So, call him 60.. then how what’s next?
Me: (Feel like wringing her neck!) Follow by his handphone number lor… Please dial 006012-XXX XXXX.
Oh please God! Help me keep my sanity.