Posts Tagged ‘mom’

Hokkien Translated English

December 1, 2010

My mom encouraged us to speak more English at home since young but it was a failure. We tend to speak Hokkien more because that was the dialect that we grew up speaking. Imagine speaking to my brother and sister in English as if we don’t have a dialect! Hey.. I am a proud Hokkien, you know! We turn out just fine! I think our English isn’t so bad – thanks to Mom for sending us to Sunday School when we were young to learn the language; knowing Jesus is secondary since now, I am a total backslider.

So now, mom is instilling the habit to the children at home – Sasha, Lok Lok and Quan Quan. As usual, Sasha is ok to learn but not Lok Lok. That one is a typical cina ah pek. You speak to him in English – he would either look aloof or answer you in Mandarin. As for Sasha, she tends to mix English with Malay. Quan Quan by far is the better one because he is now being sent to an English kindergarten. He taught my mom new words yesterday – mucous!

Just now my mom was trying to speak to him in English, so here, we are going to learn some Hokkien translated English.

“Wait you” – Gua Dan Lu (Meaning: I will wait for you)

“Wait me” – Dan Gua (Meaning: Please wait for me)

“What happen you?” – Cho Mik Soo Lu (What’s going on with you?)

“Pu-er boy!” – Budak miskin (This is malay! Haha! Instead of saying poor boy, she would say Pu-er boy like the Chinese tea).

“Too Date!” – Uuwa liao. (Too late actually!)

“Too leg!” – Uuwa liao (Another blunder when we tried to correct her – too late)

“Teli ma” – Teddy Bear (My aunt wrote next to the ABC chart, next to T for Teddy Bear in Hokkien pronunciation. “Bear” (as in horse character in Mandarin) to be read in hokkien)

“Sampah man” – Pia sampah lang (Garbage collector)

“Faster Faster wake up!” – Kin kin ki lai! (She always has to say this because QQ always has problems waking up in the morning)

I simply dare not think of what might have happened to me if I were to speak such improper English at home since young. I could be writing an Ah Lian blog now! Haha!

Seven Eleven

June 23, 2010

Mom always forgets her own birthday. She would just go through it without realizing till we ask her if she wants to have KFC. Then she would ask, what is the occasion? We will say, it’s your birthday! Now she will never forget her birthday, thanks to sis.

Mom: I always forget when is my birthday!

Sis: Easy to remember mah! 7-11. July, 11th.

Mom: Aiyoh.. no wonder hard life lah.

Sis: Why ah?

Mom: 7-11, open 24 hours a day, 7days a week. No wonder, I work and work and work endlessly! Just like 7-11!

Mom, she sure has wicked sense of humour!

Internet is God

June 21, 2010

Over the weekend, we received a visit from our new neighbor. Mom was attending to her and they had small talks. After the chat, mom was alarmed to know that the prosperity plant in front of my house porch has potential hazardous chemical. She demanded it to be disposed instantly!

Mom: The plant has chemicals that cause cancer you know!

Me: What? How?

Mom: The aunty said, in certain days of the month, chemicals will be released from the plant and if we inhale it, we will get cancer.

Me: It has been there so many years lah! Some more people envy us for this plant because we manage to grow it like no other. It’s a symbol of prosperity!

Mom: No no.. take away and throw it! It’s poisonous!

Sis: I read it on the internet before. It’s poisonous!

Me: Really?

Mom: I also don’t know you play what internet! Things like these also you don’t know!

Me:… So if I “play” internet, then I can become doctor also lah! Can cure all kinds of disease! Can even resurrect the dead! My! I can be Jesus Christ!

*tulan*

Mom is a bit kuajiong in this matter but, then I googled up the poisonous plant. Apparently, it is only poisonous if you consume it. Afterall, who on earth would want to eat that glossy plant. It sure looks nice, but not in appetizing sort of way. Here’s the search if you want to read about it.

So people, don’t take for granted what people tells you. Take some time to do your research. Like my mom said – play internet everyday how come you don’t know! Haha!


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