Broad Daylight Hypocrisy

This morning’s assembly…

Part of the speech which made me yawned indiscriminately and suffered ear pain for terrible spoken English.. and I bet, this won’t be e-mailed to us like every other assembly’s speech.

“.. you know ah.. later got blood test… you have to do blood test to know if your cholesterol is high… bad and good… if bad got more… then you will get high blood pressure… then you will get stroke…. If you heart beat too much ah…. then you will get heart attack….”

“… now I want to talk about diabetes…. Usually ah… people get it …. Keturunan… you know.. you come out from your parents… so, half of your parents body sugar will go to you…. we know Malaysia a lod of foods…. nasi lemak… teh tarik… a lot of sugah… if you take too much sugah… you will get diabetes… you know if you have a wound in your body, the wound will get bigger…. Then you have to cut your hand.. then cut both your legs….”

“…. Now I want to tell you about liver… liver is detoxify your body… you will get cancer if your body too much toxin…. No alcohol… no smoking… second hand smoking also not good…..sleep is important.. you know or not, from 11 pm to 2 to 3 am, your liver will start to work…. I ask people… people will say, 11 pm ah? The disco baru start…… Haha…. Have to sleep… if no, then cancer…”

Omigod. Someone please get him off the mic, I thought to myself.

It was hilarious as it really happened. He was going on and on about the killer diseases, then his mic was turned off. He went, “Hello? Hello?”


After the assembly, without the slightest care in the world, everyone happily tucked into their nasi lemak with ayam masak rendang with extra sambal sotong, and washed it all down with teh tarik. The speaker did the same too.

8 thoughts on “Broad Daylight Hypocrisy

  1. wah, your office is really happening lah. got morning assembly some more. any monday prayer or not? it reminds me of my form 6 days. there would be this brother robert saying prayer after headmaster’s speech during the monday assembly after school. it was normally hot & stuffy in the big hall to accomodate so many classes. i would normally stood there 1/2 asleep. when brother ended the payer with “amen” would automaticaly wake up. those were the days… hahaha…

  2. Blue devil: Everyone hesitated. Today, I saw they had reduced overeating. Haha!

    ml: Wah.. still got bro going up the pulpit to pray? I remember this only happened when my primary school principal is a Christian. After that, no more.

    Ryuu: Sakit my telinga you know!! Habis… broken english habis habis..

  3. Hahahhaa………so funny!!!

    Anyway, really envy u have assembly then got free makan somemore. Better than school days!!

  4. Colourmecrazy: Yeah.. It’s quite nice lah the nasi lemak. In fact, we don’t really care about the assembly unless something related to salary is being announced… after that, everyone would pounce on the nasi lemak!

    Zewt: Monthly assembly – full swing – siap with patriotic songs and baca ikrar ok! Hahhaha. It’s a tradition for the past 30 years, to show our patriotism.

    Ann: Yeah yeah. Everyone just envy us for the makan only. Hahahhaha. Not standing in the sun for assembly and wearing idiotic looking uniforms.

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