A friend said to me, if she had a choice, she would live in her mom’s basement the rest of her life; surfing through the internet, flipping books on techie stuffs and be a super nerd. She told me when she was much younger, she used to loiter around town by herself, sat at one corner and observed people. She could even eat alone in restaurants. Naah.. unfortunately, she is too pretty to be living in her mom’s basement and got married instead! Haha!

When it comes to shopping, I usually do it alone. I prefer to take my time to browse through things I want to buy and not worried where my friends would be. And I don’t think I have enough patience to shop with others. For example, I simply couldn’t tolerate people who is torn between a black or brown purse and took the entire hour just flipping the same thing over and over again. Or worse, people who negotiated a bargain and then decided not to buy anything.

I thought of my college days. I remember once, I was overstressed with studies that I need to get movie fix. In that week alone, I watched 3 movies – one with friends and two movies alone. From that day onwards, I think I could do movies alone and sometimes, whenever I was on leave, I would just go to a cinema and buy a ticket. Once, since a friend stood me up last minute, I went on ahead and watched Armageddon at the now-defunct rat infested Rex Cinema in Petaling Street.

Yesterday, while waiting for a friend to catch a movie together, I was loitering in KLCC alone. I didn’t want to have dinner at first. But since the stomach grumbled till no end, I relented. I had the nice lam mee from the Noodles shop on the top floor of KLCC. As I was walking through the food court, I saw a few ladies having dinner alone themselves. When I chose a spot to plunk my ass, there was a lady sitting right across me. She was also dining alone. At first, I was tempted to sit with her and strike a conversation but it would make her think I am a bloody maniac (and probably confirm I am a lesbian), given the current circumstances where any act of strangers are deemed malicious.

I recollect memories of yesteryears with fondness where we could simply strike up conversation without worrying the other party having malicious thoughts. I remembered once after college, I went to White Castle to have a meal and there was another lady eating alone. We just smiled at each other and sat together and had the longest conversation. Those were the days.

I always had lunch alone when I was in college, usually a quick bite of tuna croissant with coffee at Meidi-ya before attending classes and going for a swim at Bukit Jalil swimming pool right after college. I did this all by myself.

I miss the old days of doing everything alone and not being afraid at all.

*Hitori means alone in Japanese

13 thoughts on “Hitori

  1. I like being alone sometimes.. but i think.. i donch like looking stupid…. hahahahah!! and on the going for movies alone.. i would love that.. if i didn’t get harassed by some maniac.. who bought a ticket.. next to my seat.. and tried to molest me..!! yup..! bad experience… and that ended my alone movie date with myself.

  2. What a wistful post! But yes, these days people do tend to look at us funny if we are out alone, esp. dining or watching a movie by ourselves. Why should we let the opinions of others affect us though, if that’s what we really like to do?

    I had the most fantastic time yesterday after gym, shopping (something I rarely do except out of necessity and usually forced to and accompanied by a bevy of friends)… it was leisurely yet efficient since I didn’t have to wait on others.

    In other words, sometimes being alone can be quite… Perfect.🙂

  3. i hate to eat alone.
    had enough of those 60 over nights of lonely dinner in a stranger’s land during my last overseas assignment. i felt so pathetic simply because i allowed myself to think it that way. that of course, made me missed my friends so much more.

  4. i love shopping alone (i know i don’t really look like that type of person)… my sentiments matchs urs exactly… true about striking a convo n hving ppl deem u as weird… i have been at both the receiving end and the one hving that thoughts at the same time…. my bad… so yes i know how it feels too but at times… i try not to do it as i know how it felt to b at the receiving end…

    i guess it’s really a case of perception for us… if u feel comfortable den to hell with the rest of the world… a saying i once read somewhere… “nobody can make u feel inferior without ur consent”… was it in Princess Diaries?? Prolly…😉

    Happy New Year in advance!!!

  5. I eat alone quite a lot especially with all the traveling i do. and yes i do feel a bit weird sometimes, because I am quite a people person. But I’ve gotten quite used to it now. And i’ve grown to like my own company.🙂

    And i totally agree with shopping alone. i think its more efficient and justs saves more time, because you can hit all the shops you want, without stopping to wait for your friends,
    or worrying that your friends would be bored.

    Alone can be good and we shouldn’t be afraid of it.

    PS: i’ve tagged you on my blog.🙂 hope you’ll have time to do it.

  6. Mama BoK: I think I was lucky not to have bumped into such maniacs during my “alone” days. Haha! I remember once, I was with a group of friends and a guy actually masturbated next to my girlfriend and we ended up screaming away. Hahhaha.

    Kenny Mah: A lot of people still have qualms to dine alone. I don’t particular like eating alone but I am ok to watch movie or shop alone. Yes. It’s more efficient and time saving to shop alone.

    jk: eating alone for two months can be quite torturing and no fun. But it’s fun to do things alone sometimes.

    asstha: Hey! Happy new year!

    lingzie: I have done the tag! Thanks! I added you in my blogroll! I think I am prepared to do things alone. Have to start getting used to it. Once your group of friends are married and have kids, I am left on my own!

  7. Hi Gina, thanks for your comment in my blog.

    ya, I can watch movie alone, shop alone, sleep alone (in fact, I’m the only child in the family, I sleep alone for more than 20 years) but I find it hard to eat alone… don’t know why, just felt like want to share my food with others. I’m a sales person, and most of the time, in the afternoon I’m outside alone. If I can’t find a friend or customer to eat with me, I will just mix my meal replacement and drink it in car. Hehe, my friends think that I’m crazy.

  8. Sam: No problem. I saw your pics on Siem Reap and I had to say, they are really nice. eh? Meal replacement? On diet is it? Hahaha. Good way to keep fit actually.

  9. Lol…I just did an entire day’s worth of shopping alone today. It’s not that I don’t have friends to go with, it’s just that I felt like shopping by myself today. I could take my own sweet time with whatever that catches my fancy without worrying I’m holding up anyone else. Also, I enjoyed the solitude of it all… I’m planning a vacation soon by myself to someplace exotic…if my purse holds enough dough that is.😛

    Yea…it’s hard to trust strangers nowadays with all that news in the papers…but I wouldn’t mind having a hot mama plonking next to me the next time i’m having my meals alone.😉

  10. [Knowing smile] I am still wishful but I know it’s not to be. Perhaps in the next life.

    Now, my hubby can’t wait to earn enough for me to stop working and lock me indoors at home with my kid. Then, I’d truly be a “Yellow-face woman” (chinese phrase). Then again, I am beginning to think it wouldn’t be too bad if he could provide me with a good sum of monthly allowance and equip me with a decent laptop to go online😛 LOL.. then, I’ll be a nerdy housewife. Yuk yuk yuk.

    Solitude suits me good if there aren’t any perverted sicko masturbating in front of me! I have been victimized a number of times by these sick people. Can’t a girl even eat alone in peace in a decent restaurant w/o being on object of perversion?? Grrrr!!!

  11. inaesb: Yes lor.. wahh.. planning on a vacation? Do blog about it.🙂 I dare not travel alone though. I think it’s better to have a companion while traveling – not the katak type. The ones that could get along with you fine. Haha! Yeah. If anyone would just sit next to me and start a conversation, I would have my doubts as well that this person might be a psycho. Haha.

    Kleio: In the next life? Haha. Well, this phrase is always used by persons who had already relented to try anything new in life! I guess we just have to improve on what we have and learn to accept things we couldn’t change. I wish you would get to live your hermit life as promised by your husband. Haha!

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